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“Yet Another Awards Ceremony”

 

Heidi’s Intro

“During the students’ track session this week, Dr. David Stevens let us in on a CMDA secret.  He told us that skits have been a tradition throughout the years at the CMDA conferences.  Tonight, we the students, the younger generation, want to keep this tradition alive.  Tonight, we present to you, “Yet Another Awards Ceremony.””

 The characters tonight are…Al Weir, David Stevens, Ruth Bolton, Gene Rudd, David Belman, and Tracy Coppedge.

 Al: Welcome you to our CMDA National convention here at schroon lake…schrooon…sounds like schroom…Hmm….

 Anyways, we would especially like to welcome to our students

 Could the students stand up?  Students??  Hmm…

 (looks around…Dave on phone)

 Dave?  We do have students here?

 Dave (was on phone):  They’re still padding across the lake from the bible institute

 Al: That’s right.  We did put them 10 miles away…downstream!

 Well, they’ll get here eventually

 I’m sorry to inform you that another person could not be here tonight.  A distinguished physician, author and personal friend…dr. walt larimore

 Dave, did you have a message from Walt for us?

 David: Yes, I do…I LOVE YOU (with hand motions)

 Gene: Isn’t that special?

 Let’s go ahead and get started…Do we have a quorum?

 (Dave on phone in background)

 David Belman:  “David Belman, England .  Yes, we do have a quorum.  I find it interesting that you need an Englishman to start the proceedings.”

 

Al: Thank you David.  And if I had a gavel, I would use it at this point.  I seem to have misplaced my gavel.  Anyone see my gavel?  So, we will need a hand count.

 Gene? Can we get a handcount?  Oh, Gene is reading Walt Larimore books here on stage.

 It’s time for the award…

 Thank you for being here at this awards ceremony tonight because we here at CMDA ALL like awards, DON’T WE?

 Tonight is a special night because we are presenting one of our most distinguished awards.

 The “FUTURE Servant of Christ” award…

 We decided to present this award tonight because in 50 years when the recipient really deserves it, they may be lost in the jungles of Africa

 And we’d like to prevent a 20km or even a 10km walk to communicate with us!

 The recipient of this award is from a family who has received this award for 6 consecutive generations…all recipients have been Wheaton graduates, except Uncle Joe who graduated from Calvin.  But we don’t talk about him.

 Let me tell you a few of the future accomplishments of tonight’s receipient.

 -The establishment of a hydroelectric plant in Botswana

 -institution of a community health initiative that includes the installation of LATRINES.

 Let me say that again.  The installation of Latrines in 80% of the households in the 1040 window…

 Let’s give a round of applause for that!!

 (Dave stands up to clap…then sits back down)

 Al: David, there is more

 -there’s a note here that he even cleaned them!

 -he will also be known for personally sweeping the floors of his mission hospital in Cambodia before going home to wash the dishes with his wife and play scrabble with his family.

 -he will also be heavily recruited by, billy, ruthie, and frankie for his work overseas

 -he has already agreed to publish 20 books by the age of 20 with Zondervan Publishing

 you’ve all heard of Walt Larimore’s series “10 Essentials to healthy living” for adults, adolescents, and children

 The first book will be an addition called “10 Essentials to healthy living” for neonates

Sure to be a best-seller!

 As a part of this award, we have already arranged for the recipient’s summa cum laude graduation from Wheaton College

 David would you present the “Future Servant of Christ” award to Phinneas Lee

 (award given to pregnant lady by david stevens)

 Al: Well, thank you for being here tonight…

 ( tracy brings note to Al)

  Tracy : Excuse me, Al…I have a note for you.

 Al: I was just notified that we have one more award to present tonight.  It’s the “most decorated CMDA member EVER award”  You’ve seen her.  You’ve seen her ribbons.  You envy them.  It’s my pleasure to present the most decorated CMDA member EVER award to Dr. Ruth Bolton

 (Ruth gets up)

 Ruth: I had to rush in here from the golf course, and I nearly tripped on all of my ribbons.  It’s very difficult to play golf with all of these ribbons.  I’m kind of bewildered at how I got here, but I’m president anyway.  And that’s another ribbon.

 David: Actually, we have another award to give tonight. 

 Al, you may not know about this, but we would like to recognize you for faithfully serving as

Student delegate, student trustee, board member, president elect, president, and now past president…and we are looking forward in 10 years for he’ll be serving as “president 10 years ago”

 (Ruth perks up)

 Ruth: Is he going to get another ribbon?

 David:  Tracy , can we print another ribbon?

  Tracy : Consider it, done.

 David: because al seems to have misplaced his gavel, we were going to present you with a gold plated presidential gavel, but we seem to have misplaced that as well!

 So, we’re going to give you a ribbon instead.

 (phone rings)

 David:  “David Stevens….W!  $50 million AND Air force one?  I’m in the middle of an awards ceremony.  Can I have Gene call you back?”

 (Gene looks up)

 David:  W has decided to donate $50 million to CMDA, and we will be able to add onto our GHO and GHS ministries with 5 additional ministries: GHI, GHM, GHP, GHA, GHX, GHT and GHR.

 In fact, this gives me another idea!

  Tracy , set up a direct link to Zondervan for direct publication.  I need to dictate my next book!

 The title will be “There’s always a better way to do it, and I’ve figured out how!”

 


Last updated 6/15/03
by jil2@cornell.edu